Kwai and dry

We left Bangkok on Sunday from the Thonburi railway station on the West side of the river (a sweaty 20 minute hike from the river boat terminal; worth the toil though because the taxi quoted us an astronomical 1000 baht for the same trip!). We were a smidgen early so grabbed a couple of well earned Fantas before the train arrived. We were ushered onto the train by a helpful guard and settled into our big orange third class benches! The carriage was massively retro and every bit of it oozed character – from the solid wooden painted bench seats to the big steel ceiling fans this was definitely a train journey from days gone by! I particularly enjoyed the fact that you could see out onto the track from the open door at the end of the carriage – just about resisted the urge to dangle off the back!

Old school carriage

More retro railway action

Extreme!

We soon clickety-clacked off down the slightly wobbly track towards our destination, the carriage pretty much to ourselves. As soon as we’d got up a reasonable amount of speed (about 30 mph at a guess) we slowed down to pick up a few passengers at probably the smallest station in the world. This was to be the running theme for the journey – stopping about every five minutes to pick people up in the middle of nowhere! The scenery was pretty awesome however so it more than made up for the slow progress – lots more lush paddy fields, banana palms, the odd temple for good measure, all with the mountains of Myanmar (Burma) slowly rising in the distance.

A station smaller than ‘Appleford’ on the all-stopper between Reading and Oxford – I didn’t think it was possible!

Token temple

This chap was enjoying hanging out of the window – good lad!

Myanmar’s mountains… and a pylon

We eventually arrived about an hour behind schedule in one piece, albeit with slightly achy behinds from the wooden benches! We set off for our guesthouse and, after half an hour and a fair few orientation issues, discovered that it was in fact only about 200m from the station – whoops! We checked in, grabbed some tucker and attempted to sleep ready for an horrendous early start the following day!

We’d been told the train for Namtok was at 0627 so we’d got up in time to leg it to the station, get our tickets then wait for the train. Turns out the train was actually scheduled for 0545 but thanks to the train being ridiculously late on a regular basis we hadn’t missed it – it eventually arrived at just before 7! Kanchanaburi is famous primarily for its steel railway bridge made famous in the 1957 film ‘The Bridge on the River Kwai’. The film itself was actually shot in Sri Lanka, however this doesn’t stop the vendors in the numerous gift shops, bars and restaurants in the area milking it to the maximum, but good on them! The bridge was bombed by the Allies in 1944 and 1945 but has been repaired to its former glory and is still in use today – we crossed the aged steel spans about 10 minutes into our journey.

Train arriving at Kanchanaburi… obviously late

Crossing the bridge

The stretch of track between Kanchanaburi and Namtok (and the now retired section onwards into Burma) was nicknamed the ‘Death Railway’. During World War 2, the Japanese forced POW’s and Asian labourers to work night and day with only pickaxes, shovels and dynamite in perilous conditions to create a railway linking their newly acquired territories of Burma and Singapore together. Over 100,000 labourers and POW’s died during the 19 months it took to construct the railway; there are cemeteries and memorials to those who died all over Kanchanaburi.

The three hour journey took us parallel to the border, shadowing the Kwai for the majority of the time. At one point we slowed to a crawl to negotiate a particularly hairy section where we traversed track clinging to the cliff edge with 70 year-old timbers – it felt disturbingly like an old school wooden rollercoaster! Other sections took us through deep ravines cut into the rock by hand – the work to create this line must have been brutal.

Through the rocks….

 

Over the fields…

…and above the water!

Not too shabby!

Throughout the journey, kids were hopping on and off the train to go to school. It was nice to see that even though they probably travelled this route every day, they were still sticking their heads out of the windows and soaking up the incredible views! Anyway, we eventually arrived at Namtok, grabbed a coffee at the local cafe and had a look around the village. This took all of 10 minutes because it was in fact pretty tiny, however it was nice to be away from all the tourist tat and in a proper rural village. We opted to get the bus back to Kanchanaburi rather than wait another 5 hours for the next train, seizing the opportunity to grab some shut-eye before exploring for the rest of the day!

Kanchanaburi was a peculiar place. The town is centred around the tourist quarter, which hugs the river with guesthouses and restaurants all fighting for prime river frontage. The strangest thing was how quiet the town was – granted it is the off season in Thailand but seeing so many completely empty bars made us think that the town has been hit hard by the downturn in tourism caused by the protests. It was literally us, about 20 other backpackers and maybe the same number of older Western gents with one or more attractive Thai girls on their arms if you catch my drift! We were half expecting some tumbleweed to roll past! It was good to have visited Kanchanaburi - we definitely would recommend the lush scenery surrounding the town after our short cycle trip and the journey up the railway, however we can safely say it hasn’t made our ‘must revisit’ list!

Fran playing chicken with the train (not really!)

Rich testing the build quality of the bridge

Cycling through the countryside

‘Quaint’ Kanchanaburi (note the ‘Bridge over the River Kwai’ themed street lamps!)

Our next stop after Kanchanaburi was to be the island of Koh Phangan. Sadly there’s no teleport between the two so it turned into a bit of a ‘tour de force’ of overland travel (commonly known as a right pain in the behind) – 2 hour minibus journey through a monsoon, riverboat through Bangkok, 14 hour overnight train, 1 hour on a coach to the ferry, 3 hour ferry trip then a songthaew (jeep taxi) trip to round off a 24 hour marathon!

 

Somewhat soggy!

 

To the riverboat…

Station teeming with Full Mooners

Paddington looking forward to tucking into some Sang Som

Speeding toward Koh Samui en route to Koh Phangan

All that travelling was worthwhile in the end though as our beachfront accommodation for the next 5 days turned out to be a little piece of paradise! The Haad Rin tourist village itself is a bit of a blot on the landscape but the rest of Koh Phangan is even more beautiful than we’d expected – lush tropical forest, ramshackle huts on the beach front, coconut palms and rocky outcrops dotting the golden sandy beaches, clear azure water tempting you to dive in (though it’s really shallow and hotter than bath water)!

 

The plan for the next few days was to rest and recuperate, ready to go bananas with 10,000 other people at the infamous Full Moon party. This plan was good in theory, however we ended up being led astray on Thursday night by the evil Ko Phangan buckets! At least we’ve put our livers in training ready for the Full Moon party proper on Saturday! Anyway, we’ll report back with our review of the cultural experience that is the Ko Phangan Full Moon party!!!

Awesome fire dancers on Haad Rin beach

Do the Bangkok

Our vision of the Siem Reap to Bangkok bus journey was a 2 hour snooze whilst speeding down smooth, straight roads to the border in a luxury coach, a seamless crossing followed by another 3 hours on another super-smooth, relaxing bus ride to deliver us well rested to Bangkok. This fantasy was to stay just that – the reality was somewhat different! Having been collected at 7:45am, after 5 minutes we were dropped off about 500m down the road to wait half an hour for a bigger bus. When said bus arrived, it looked like the last stop was in the ‘70’s - it was clean and the air con worked however so we were more than happy. We’d read that the road to the border had been recently improved so were expecting big things. Though it was markedly better than the dirt track that linked Phnom Penh to Siem Reap, I still don’t think this section of bumpy tarmac would be out of place on a World Rally stage! We arrived at the border a couple of hours later and commenced the ‘seamless’ border procedure - getting off our Cambodian bus and collecting our luggage, exchanging our tickets for a yellow sticker (!), lugging our bags to the Cambodian checkpoint then to the Thai checkpoint across the bizarre no mans land between the two containing a huge casino and scores of beggars and hawkers, finally emerging on the Thai side after about an hour! A half hour wait (for our mysterious man in a trilby hat to return to tell us where we went next) and a 15 minute trek in the midday sun was followed by a hairy 20 minute journey in the back of a pickup truck (8 of us with massive rucksacks in the back of an L200 van with the tail down – felt like we were going to war!), dropping us off at a restaurant in the middle of nowhere. 2 hours and two delicious Pad Thais later, our minibus picked us up for the hair-raising 3 hour trip at what seemed like Warp 9 to Bangkok! We finally arrived at our hostel after nigh on 11 hours in transit, just about having enough energy in reserve to fend off the countless taxi driver and tuk tuk scams on the final leg! Our hostel – Lub D in the Silom district of Bangkok – was thankfully an oasis of calm after all that excitement a good night’s sleep was very welcome indeed!

Flying along in our jeep!

 

Queues of trucks going into Cambodia, plus our first proper Thai Tuk-Tuk (the Cambodian ones are basically motorbikes with a trailer)

On the speedy riverboat in Bangkok, en route to the hostel

One of the many Wats (temples) in Bangkok from the riverboat

Having crossed from Cambodia into Thailand, the difference in the level of affluence between the two is marked. Though there is poverty in rural parts of Eastern Thailand, the majority of people are much better off than their neighbours in Cambodia and the infrastructure seems much better, with big expressways linking the big cities and trains that are so safe they are actually allowed to carry passengers! Tourism is now a big earner in Thailand, though some of the Tuk-Tuk and taxi drivers seem hell-bent on scamming tourists to squeeze as much money out of them as they can! We’d read up on the numerous scams before getting to Thailand and thankfully avoided getting conned but there must be thousands of people that do! You are forever being told ‘The palace/temple/shopping centre is closed – I take you to one that’s open’ or being offered a whole day in a Tuk-Tuk for just 10 baht (where they take you to every shop/restaurant in Bangkok offering them commission as opposed to where you want to go)! One favourite was a taxi driver quoting 1000 baht (£20) for a 2 minute taxi ride – good try! There were more scary sounding and expensive scams in the late-night ‘entertainment establishments’ in the Patpong area near our hostel but as we weren’t brave enough to enter any we avoided these!!!

Our first full day in Bangkok involved a fair bit of indulgence in the Western comforts that we’d been without for what seemed like an eternity – namely fast food and masses of shops! We visited the humongous MBK centre – 7 floors of bargain shops where you can hone your bartering skills to a T! This centre would be impressive on its’ own, however it is only one of probably 20+ centres like this in Bangkok’s city centre alone! Bargain clothes were the order of the day as our limited backpack wardrobes were in need of refreshing!

MBK centre – like one of the temples of Angkor but dedicated to the god of shopping

Traffic everywhere, and the Skytrain towering above the gridlock!

We also took the opportunity to pop to the main railway station to book our onward leg to Koh Phangan island (for the essential Full Moon Party at the end of the month). The scams were in full effect here too – the official information desk helpfully providing us with all the information about the train times before leading us upstairs to an agent for their commission. After extracting the information we required from the agent, we headed back down the stairs and saved 600 baht by buying the same ticket from the ticket desk!!!

Hua Lamphong Station (or Humpalong as we nicknamed it)

Stilt houses on the stinky canal near the station!

We went for a run in nearby Lumphini Park on the second day. This beautifully landscaped park was a welcoming open space in this hectic city, with ponds and fountains amongst the lush greenery. We later discovered that Lumphini Park was actually the centre of the Red Shirts’ encampment during the recent protests – other than the 5 soldiers patrolling the park on pink bicycles there was no trace of any of the troubles; incredible seeing as it was only a month or so ago. The only thing that we did notice was that one of Bangkok’s shopping malls – Zen World – had been completely gutted by fire during the riots that followed the military operation to disperse the camp. A few days later we were talking to a Canadian chap who lived in Bangkok about the protests – it was interesting to hear about how tense things were and that from the sounds of things the protesters were being funded by the ousted President. The British media seemed to portray the army as the aggressors whereas the locals seemed to side with the current government. Who knows what propaganda to believe?!

The devastated Zen World centre

Much like Cambodia, there are numerous Wat temples all over Bangkok. We did our best to conquer as many as we could in our time in Bangkok, however it’s easy to experience ‘temple overload’ and get ‘Wat-ted out’! I swear on one of our days in Bangkok we actually saw more gold Buddhas than people! Anyway, we saw the ‘largest indoor Buddha statue in a reclined position’ (quite a claim to fame) and the world’s largest solid gold Buddha! The latter had a fascinating story behind it – cast in the 13th century, it had been encased in stucco to protect it from theft by marauding Burmese invaders; it was only discovered as being solid gold underneath when someone moving it broke a bit off in the 1950’s! It weighs five and a half tonnes and at current prices would cost $140 million!!!

Big Buddha head

Big Buddha feet

Mog suffering from ‘temple overload’

Bling Buddha

We checked out the most impressive Bangkok tourist landmark on our penultimate day – the Grand Palace. This luxuriant collection of impressive buildings is a glittery display, especially in the midday sun! The rules of admission stipulated that everyone should have their shoulders and legs covered so we had to don our trousers and spend a sweltering few hours looking round the palace grounds –phew! Highlights included the somewhat holy Wat Phra Kaeo which contains the Jade Buddha (a tiny figure which is Thailand’s most important icon) and the enormous golden Phra Si Ratana Chedi which apparently houses a piece of Buddha’s chest bone! Another highlight were the Ramayana murals. These murals stretch 1km around the inner walls of the compound, depicting various stories of war and revenge including one particularly grizzly bit where someone gets decapitated (see photo below) – nice!

Royal Palace from the outside

A fair bit of gold and shiny mosaic

Phra Si Chatana Chedi

Even the murals are gold!

A big ruck

Unlucky chap loses head whilst flying through the air

Big miniature model of Angkor Wat

Spot the waving cameraman…

Rich makes a new friend

The Grand Palace

Fran makes a new friend too!

On the Friday evening, we went on one of the more ‘educational’ experiences from our wedding list (thanks Ross & Rachael). The Calypso Cabaret is a Bangkok institution and is famous for both its flamboyant performances and flamboyant performers! We arrived at the slightly jaded but grand 1980’s Asia Hotel at 8pm, descended into the basement ballroom, settled into our second row seats next to an elderly Chinese couple and ordered our free drink from the hostess. The compere soon appeared and announced the beginning of the show in English, Thai, Chinese and Japanese and the first performer appeared. The next hour and a bit was a sight to behold – singing, dancing, extravagant costumes, slapstick humour, splashes of vibrant colour everywhere and some slightly too revealing outfits all contributing to a captivating show. The underlying fact that all of the performers were born with an X and a Y chromosome was hard to comprehend quite a lot of the time – most of the performers had undergone some pretty major surgery if you get our drift?! Anyway, after the show you could meet the ‘girls’ on the way out so we took the opportunity to grab a quick photo with a few of them – check them out below! We had an excellent time and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves, even though it was a little bizarre to say the least!

Kylie wannabe at the front!

 

Geishas in full flow

 

Meet the girls!

On our last night in Bangkok we decided to have a couple of drinks before dinner; as we were pouring our second drink, a couple from our China trip (Mike & Claire) walked in to check into our hostel for the night (we’d bumped into them in Siem Reap as well)! We ended up going out for dinner and chatting into the early hours – good to have someone to natter to!

Enjoying a ‘bucket’ at our hostel!

Anyway, I’m writing this from our room in Kanchanaburi – a few hundred kilometres West of Bangkok, close to the border with Myanmar (Burma). I’ll fill you in on the train journey in the next post but in the meantime here’s a photo for all of my lovely colleagues back at Deya…

Fancy field managing this one next year anyone…?!